Thursday, April 19, 2007

Sup

No one reads this blog. Which is cool. If you think you can phase me just by that fact, consider that I spent five years writing a novel and then put it in my filing cabinet. No one has been breaking into that filing cabinet. Because no one cares! including me. except your momma.

This post has started off so excellent that I don't know where to head from here. Perhaps a unique piece of memorabilia from Mr Bungle will do?



What you are viewing is a photo of hefetz, the drummer. maffu, correct me if i'm wrong. anyway, it's from approximately 1995. i wrote them a letter and promised to pen an essay on the freudian significance of their song "berenice" if they wrote back. they did, and I didn't write that article. that would have made me an asshole, except they were a cool band and I was a highschool kid, so I think they forgave me. anyway, what I was going to write was inspired by the fact that I read several books by freud in high school.

freud had a theory, developed like all of his dream interpretation theories based anecdotally on interviews with patients, that the loss of teeth in a dream reflected one's own guilt about masturbation. sorry to drop the m word on you so late in this post I probably should have disclaimed it in the title. anyway, if I remember correctly from ten years ago he also had some campbell style theories about aboriginal punishment of masturbation by tooth removal or some such nonsensical but enticing factoidal whatever. in my own anecdotal experience (equally anecdotal, but standing on the SHOULDERS OF GIANTS) i have surmised that his theory doesn't make too much sense because the loss of a tooth is supposed to signify the loss of a wang, but women also have this dream element frequently, and they don't have wangs, either in the dream or in real life, and hence I smell a fish (a wangless and toothless fish).

whatever. fuck you. poe was a good guy. he was made into a genre later. people misinterpret that postfactually as a damnation, while it is actually the highest praise. the man was good, if a bit warpo.

mr bungle is a good band. that's why when I spent five years writing a book that was about a rock band fronting a cult about the ultimate secret of the universe, the band was loosely modeled (if only in superficial ways) after mr bungle. so even though I didn't write the freudian article they should not flame throw me.

Thursday, April 5, 2007

The Finger

Back by unpopular demand, a story I wrote in 1996

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